I have reached the halfway point of my journey. Wow. Today is New Years Eve and then I only have 3 more days until I can get my old life back. That sounds awful, as if I'm trapped, but in a way I am. My entire day revolves around the kids and I can't really go anywhere without bringing them with me. Even the 10 minutes I spend in the shower away from them, my mind is going through horrible scenarios that could be taking place when I'm not there to watch them.
In a few ways, this experience has gotten easier. Over 5 days, I have gotten used to the new routine of the day, the smells and sounds of the house, the personalities of the two kids, and whereabouts to find everything in the kitchen. I've also gotten better at deciphering what the two of them are saying. Neither of them speaks very clearly and as a language major it's very infuriating to not understand what someone is saying.
Currently supper is in the oven, as well as a batch of cookies that I turned into a loaf shape. I figured they wouldn't care what shape their cookies were in, and frankly I didn't have the patience to dick around with all the spoonfuls of cookie dough.
As tonight is New Years Eve, I'm praying that both kids pass out around 8am at the latest and I don't have to listen to the wailing of Isla again for another four hours. FML. Again, I am getting paid for this, and sometimes that is my only incentive not to put my hand through the wall. It's kinda hard for me to read all of my friends on Facebook posting their status about what they are going to be doing this evening, knowing that I'm rooted here with no possible way of leaving.
Admittedly I'm not a party animal (part of the reason I decided to take this job) but my evening will be consisting of a bottle of sparkling wine and the couch, and possibly some Lindor chocolates. It's kinda depressing in a way too because this time last year I was with my ex on New Years; the party, the kissing at midnight, the whole shebang. Sigh. How things can change in a year.